My grievance with Covid

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON!

I am locked in my house,

I am beset with my thoughts.

I don't know when the world will be open.

I want to go out, be heard and be spoken.

I feel broken.

I live all alone, I have my chairs, table and sofa for company.

Fed up with this awful solace my soul yearns to mutiny.

My books have forsaken me, I no longer like to read them.

I water my plants, count each day the old leaves on their stem.

My dreams are vivid, I can't sleep at night,

I've lost my hair, my weight and I can't stand the sight.

I lament at all the celebrations that are lost,

I try to keep my spirits high, by looking at photos of the past.

I haven't watched the Sun rise in years, neither in some time the moon.

I do endless meetings online, work is dreary, but they say "be grateful you have a job, it's a boon".

Haven't had a hug in months and everything feels a gloom.

Tears stream down my face, not 'cause I'm sad but I watch the screen all day.

My chest hurts and those endless headaches return. I feel summer has gone and all is gray.

I want to go home, I want my friends to come home.

I want to set my parents right, I want to shout at the world

"Be quiet and don't fight".

I'm confused with the rules that are made and changed day-in and day-out.

I've stopped watching news, I no longer track the daily death count.

Like gas trapped on water, fragile is my social bubble,

I no longer know what's going on. I feel trapped, like I'm in one of Kafka's novels.

This year is the worst in my journal.

I don't like this 'new normal'.

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